Thursday after Ash Wednesday - February 18, 2021

Deuteronomy 30:15-20 Luke 9:22-25

When I first encountered the reading from Deuteronomy, I thought, “Good Grief! What happened to mercy?” But then the Psalm reading holds up hope. Today’s Gospel does not deal explicitly with love, but seems to focus on obedience. Although when Jesus tells his disciples they must “deny themselves and take up their cross,” it does open the possibility of seeing Christ in every person by denying self and extending God’s love to others.

In these readings we get the impression that the consequence of not following Christ is dire. I think that consequence would be the absence of God, and having to endure a constant, yearning for God. Yet, we are leftwith the questions, “how do I do this obedience thing?”

A little more about me: you need to understand that when I was in high school and college, I was  seriously thinking of a religious vocation. But the deciding factor came down to the vows one takes. I thought I could handle poverty and chastity. But obedience? No way! So when speaking of obedience, I prefer to focus on these prayerful words:

“ O lord make me an instrument of Thy peace. Where there is darkness, let me sow light. 

Where there is doubt, faith in Thee. Where there is hatred, let me sow Thy love. And where there is despair let steadfast hope be there.”

Those words inspired by Saint Francis of Assisi have been a part of me for a long time. Yet even these actions have consequences.

“For it is by giving that one receives, it is by self-forgetting that one finds, it is by forgiving that one is forgiven.”

It is easy to find ways to hold on to the pain of various slights, of having no control over things, of the need for gratification, of loneliness. While I find it challenging to let go of pain and forgive, I am comforted by the fact that I too can be forgiven.

Q: Who do you need to forgive today? From whom do you need to ask forgiveness?